Cabbage in Burger Drag
For when you are lying to yourself
Prep time: 20 min | Cooking time: 30 min | Total time: 40 min (I know how to do basic summation, but prep and cooking overlap here due the oven time) | Difficulty: 3/5
Cabbage, but make it burger. These roasted wedges get the whole treatment: bacon–sesame “bun crumbs,” glossy cheese sauce, pickles, and special sauce dripping down the leaves. Below you’ll find the stripped-down recipe card — everything you need to cook it tonight.
But if you’re curious about the why behind it (chef’s notes, tips, and the story that made me think cabbage could moonlight as a cheeseburger), head over to my Substack. That’s where I dig deeper.
Ingredients (serves 2)
Cabbage
Green cabbage ½ medium (~600–750 g)
Neutral oil 1 ½ tbsp
Kosher salt ½ tsp
Black pepper ¼ tsp
Garlic powder ½ tsp
Onion powder ¼ tsp
Smoked paprika ¼ tsp
Bacon–Sesame Crumb
Bacon 60 g (about 2 strips)
Panko breadcrumbs 3 tbsp
Sesame seeds 2 tsp
Mustard powder pinch
Salt and black pepper to taste
Cheese Sauce
Evaporated milk 90 ml
Cornstarch ½ tsp
Water 1 tsp (for slurry)
Cheddar cheese 70 g
Processed “hamburguer” cheese slices 15 g (1 slice)
Mustard powder ½ tsp
Garlic powder ¼ tsp
Hot sauce dash (optional)
Salt to taste
Special Sauce & Finish
Mayonnaise 3 tbsp
Ketchup 1 tbsp
Dill pickle relish (or finely minced pickle) 1 tsp
Yellow mustard ½ tsp
Pickle brine 1 tbsp
Dill pickle 1 small (for topping)
Extra sesame seeds, for topping
Equipment
Large baking tray
Chef’s knife + cutting board
Mixing bowl
Skillet
Small saucepan
Tongs
Whisk
Measuring spoons or scale
Method
Preheat tray. Set a heavy baking tray on the middle rack and heat the oven to 230 °C / 450 °F.
Quarter + season. Quarter the half-cabbage through the core so wedges hold together. Set aside 2 wedges (freeze or refrigerate the rest). In a bowl, toss the 2 wedges with neutral oil, then sprinkle with salt, black pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, and smoked paprika.
Roast. Using tongs, place wedges cut-side down on the hot tray. Roast 15 minutes, flip to the other cut side, and roast 12–15 minutes more, until edges are charred and the core is tender.
Make crumb. Finely dice the bacon. Cook in a skillet over medium heat until crisp. Transfer bacon to paper towel, leaving about 1 tbsp bacon fat in the pan. Add panko and sesame seeds; stir and toast until golden. Stir the bacon back in; season with a pinch mustard powder, salt, and pepper.
Cheese sauce. In a small saucepan, warm evaporated milk over medium-low heat. Stir cornstarch + water into a slurry; whisk in and simmer 30–60 seconds until slightly thickened. Reduce heat to low and whisk in grated cheddar gradually, then the torn processed slice, until smooth and glossy. Season with mustard powder, garlic powder, a dash of hot sauce, and salt to taste. Keep warm on very low heat; whisk if it thickens.
Special sauce. In a small bowl, stir together mayonnaise, ketchup, relish (or minced pickle), yellow mustard, and pickle brine.
Finish. Finely dice the dill pickle and snip the chives. Plate each wedge, spoon over cheese sauce so it seeps into the leaves, scatter bacon–sesame crumb, drizzle special sauce, and finish with diced pickle, chives, and a few extra sesame seeds.
Nutritional Value (estimate, per serving)
Calories: ~745 kcal
Protein: ~30 g
Carbs: ~32 g (Fiber ~9 g)
Fat: ~57 g
Estimates based on typical values for cabbage, bacon, panko, sesame, evaporated milk, cheddar + processed slice, mayo, ketchup, and pickles. Actuals vary by brand and trimming.
If you liked this, the Substack version goes deeper — chef’s tips on frying, freezing, swaps, plating tricks, all the things that make this more than just quinoa and oil. It’s free to read, and if you subscribe, you’ll get new recipes in your inbox without lifting a finger (unlike shaping 18 tiny balls).